When “Letting Go” is Not Enough

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For the past week, I’ve started researching Jon Kabat-Zinn’s work with Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction (MBSR). I’ve become fascinated by the work that him and his colleagues have done and the medical research that has come out of it. If you want to look more into MBRS, please do at: http://www.umassmed.edu/cfm/stress/index.aspx I’m actually taking a course in October in NYC to learn more about his program!

During my research of Jon Kabat-Zinn, I came across this saying he said, “It’s not a matter of letting go-you would if you could. Instead of “Let it go,” we should probably say “Let it be.” I read over the quote several times. (Realistically, probably more like 30 times!). I wanted his words to sink in. What I finally was able to make of his words was this…stop fighting, wishing and praying for the pain to go away, just let it be. Focus your energy more on what you have right now in this very moment and less on what you didn’t get in the past or what you think you can’t have in the future. Just be here today and in this moment right now.

For the past three years, I’ve been trying to let go of a lot. A lot of pain, betrayal, anger, etc., built up due to several events in my life during 2010. I’ve given so much energy (way tooo much energy) trying to get rid of all this and to fixing my heart, my spirit and my life. Looking at my life right now, I’ve come a damn long way from where I was in 2010 and I’ve truly been able to heal with the help of various outlets including self-help resources, mentors, family, friends, yoga, my support group and my loving boyfriend. I am so grateful for being blessed with all of this!

But now I’m ready to let it be. It makes perfect sense if you think about it. If we were able to just things go, it would be that easy. (I’m not talking about a bad day…we all can let that go during yoga, meditation, writing, etc.) But for the big stuff, the losses in life, the traumatic experiences, it’s not that easy – the stress, anxiety, pain, keeps coming back as we try to fight it away. Focusing our minds on removing or blocking it from our lives is just not working for most of us anymore.

Next time a negative/sad thought comes into our head, acknowledge it, maybe even write it down (that helps for me) and then go about your day. Don’t beat yourself, or continue to ask yourself why these thoughts keep coming up…they are coming up for a reason…stop fighting against them and try to just let them be. I’ll be working on this myself, each and every day going forward!

One last quick reminder for today: you are perfect just the way you are, right now in this very moment. You will heal; you find peace; you’re time will come; so for now let us all practice more on just letting it be.

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